I pulled it off

So that big surprise post I posted earlier here was a surprise trip back home!! Only a few people knew about it and the main person I was surpriseing was my dad for his birthday. Well I am so happy to say that I pulled it off. He was very surprised and is so excited to have me and baby Kevin here for 2 more weeks. After our 2 weeks are up here we will be spending one week in Idaho. We flew in Sat evening and surprised him on his birthday Sunday. It was awesome!!

Dress whites

My all time favorite military uniform is the Navy dress whites. I don't know what it is about this particular uniform but I LOVE IT!! And I love Ken in them!! I snapped these the other day when Ken had to wear them. I wish he wore them every day but I digress.

I think I have the most handsome boys alive!!

Zoo day & Camera woes

Saturday was such a beautiful day. It was 79 degrees, a slight breeze and almost no humidity, a rarity in these parts. So we decided to have our first zoo day. When we were in D.C in July we went to the zoo but it was so hot we just saw the Pandas and left. I think it was the first time I have gone to a zoo and seen every single animal. We have an amazing zoo. The exhibits are so well planned out that there are multiple views for each one. The only exhibit we didn't see was the tigers because it's under construction but it gives us something to look forward to next time.

 The giraffe, ostrich and gazelle exhibit.

 His smile melts my heart. And yes I did match his outfit for the day on purpose.

Those are the only pictures we snapped of our AMAZING zoo day. I was handing Ken the camera to take pictures of Kevin and I and he thought I had it and I thought he had it so together we let go and ... THUD. Our camera hit the ground and that was the end of our camera. The lens was out and of course that's how it landed, lens down. So after our zoo trip we took a trip to the NEX (navy exchange) and found an amazing deal on an upgraded version of our camera. I LOVED our camera and really didn't feel like getting used to a completely different kind, so we stuck with what we knew just upgraded. Well, when we got home and started playing with it we noticed it had a front LCD screen that allows you to see yourself when you turn the camera around to take a front picture. Talk about awesome!! We were very excited and immediately tried it out.

We love our new camera with it's nifty front screen!!

Game Day!!!

Our first game day as a family!!! Woo hoo!! I used to hate football. I would change the channel whenever it was on, change the topic when it was being talked about. Then when I was 15 I moved in with my Dad who I barely knew and one of the first things we did (one of my first daddy daughter dates actually) was go to a Live Seahawks and St. Louis Rams game. It was so exciting and I fell in love. After picking a favorite team (Philadelphia Eagles) when I was about 17, I started watching games religiously. Since I actually understood them I loved them!! When I first met Ken he was wearing an Eagles jersey which was an instant conversation starter. So not only are the Eagles my favorite team but they brought Ken and I together lol! Anyway here is a picture of Me, Ken and our newest Eagles fan (in the cutest Eagles slippers ever)!!

 

First day at the Beach!!

 

Today was such an amazing day, it was not humid at all, there was a slight breeze and it wasn't very hot either it was so perfect. So we decided that it would be the perfect day to go to the beach. We slathered baby in sunscreen, packed all the essentials and headed to the beach. We have held off because I am a very paranoid momma and even though they now say sunscreen is safe for babies under 6 months I have still been cautious. Kevin turned 5 months on Friday so we finally decided to go for it. Kevin loves any trip we have outside, he is definitely an outdoors baby. He is so content just feeling the breeze and enjoying the fresh air he hardly ever fusses when we are outside. Anyway, back to the beach trip. After about 20 min of trying to find a metered parking spot because the lots were about $30 to park we finally made our way to the ocean front. It wasn't as crowded as we have seen it and I think in large part it had to do with people canceling their labor day weekend plans due to hurricane Earl (they predicted he would hit here a lot harder than he did) so not only was the weather perfect but it wasn't too crowded either. Kevin absolutely loved the sand. He had so much fun kicking it and digging his toes into it.

 

 

Playing in the sand.

I took him down to the water line to see how he would react to the water. The water here is not like the water back in the pacific northwest. It is so warm it feels like lukewarm bathtub water. 

He didn't seem to mind the sand that was a little damp. He was actually pretty interested in it.

The first wave of water definitely surprised him. 

Such a good baby. He didn't fuss at all with the water. You could tell it definitely surprised him but he didn't act upset or anything. He is such an awesome boy. There were so many families at the beach with so many kids. I am so excited for next year when he will be walking and wearing little beach shorts. He is definitely going to be a little beach boy!! All in all we had such an amazing day, what a great way to end the summer!!

Looking back

I was going through my hope chest yesterday trying to downsize and I came across some of my old notebooks that I used to write in. I used to write all of my feelings down and started to wonder why I don't do that anymore. I turned to blogging because I thought it would be the same but for obvious reasons it's not. Obviously a lot more people are able to read this than my tucked away notebooks. There are more chances for judgment and criticism.  The stuff I wrote about was so personal and a lot of it had to do with traumatic experiences I went through. Stuff that only a few people know about. I also found some of the songs and stories that I wrote and it's amazing to me how angry I used to be. It's also amazing to me how I don't even recognize that person anymore. I read those stories and I feel so bad for that lost little girl who had gone through so much. There is a part in a movie called "Drop Dead Fred" where the grown up version of the main character goes back and hugs her child self. Sometimes I wish I could do that. I know that I turn out o.k and I wouldn't trade my life for anything but back then I was so lost and I think a hug would have done wonders. I look at my life now and I can't help but thank God for the things he helped me get through. I can still sometimes see the effects of these traumatic experiences though and it scares me.  I remember telling Ken when I first found out I was pregnant that I was scared I was going to have a girl and when he asked why I told him that I didn't want anything to happen to her like they did to me. I'm still afraid of the dark, of being home alone and I occasionally have nightmares. I have flashbacks that scare me and if Ken and I are arguing I shut down emotionally sometimes. I can be anxious, and over protective. I also almost always think the worst is going to happen. However, I have been able to stay in a stable relationship. I have been able to be happier than I think I have ever been and although these things cross my mind occasionally it's not every day like it once was. Not only do I not think about them every day but I also handle it better when they do. I think about my life now, and I somewhat say to myself... I made it. I can continue to make it because I am strong. I am so much stronger than I once was and I thank Ken, my Dad, Kevin, so many others in my family and I thank God.