Stuck

Lately I have been thinking about what to do with my life. My main goal always is to be an amazing mom and wife. However, I feel like I need to be doing more to accomplish this. The main thing being going back to school. I have really been contemplating this lately. Last year when we moved here I was really focused on finding a school to start and a program that I would enjoy getting into, then 3 weeks into us living here I found out I was pregnant. All the programs I was interested in would have to be placed on hold due to the fact that the baby was going to be born before I would finish. So I planned on working. The family I found to work with as a nanny has been AMAZING!!! They are so supportive, kind, loving and welcoming. Everything you would want for in a boss. Not to mention an unbelievable Christmas bonus, bringing dinner by after Kevin was born, and being completely open to letting me bring Kevin with me to work. Like I said AMAZING!! Well, of course all AMAZING things in the military community don't last. They are getting assigned to a different state :( so I am at a crossroads. I could look for another amazing family to work for who would be as understanding and accepting as them, or I could take time off from working and go back to school. Going back to school sounds like a great idea, and I could probably qualify for financial aid. But then I would need to find a babysitter which is not something I look forward to doing. We have no family here so it would need to be a stranger and that makes me nervous. It's ironic to me how I feel completely comfortable working as a nanny but absolutely dread that I might have to find one for my son. I DO NOT want to do daycare until Kevin is able to talk, that way if there is anything going on he will be able to communicate with me. So, I decided to look into night classes but then that means giving up my nightly routine with my son, not being able to feed him, read to him, snuggle him and so many other things. Even taking night classes would not ensure that we wouldn't need to find a sitter. Because as is common in the military nothing is ever sure, Ken may have duty on a night that I'm in school or another dreaded "what if" is a deployment. Which sounds like something that would happen right as we get everything figured out to our liking. SOOO.... what to do. I want Kevin to be proud of his Mom, I want him to have a college account, I want a big savings set up for him. I want so much for him. But most of all I don't want to miss out on spending time with him.

Settings

There a few people I know who love to read my blog and would like to comment on some of my posts but don't have profiles. I have changed the settings to where you can post comments without a profile it will just show up as anonymous so please sign your name so I know who you are. I have also taken off the "captcha" word verification for when you do post comments. Happy commenting everyone!!!

Beach Bum

It's official we not only have a happy water baby who loves his baths but we also have a happy outdoor baby. He loves going on walks with us, either in the stroller or in our arms. He loves to go down to the pool with us too (of course only if it's not too hot which has been a little tough lately). I thought he would hate having this hat on but he absolutely loved it!! Of course up until last Tuesday he was not always this happy. He was throwing up all the time and used to be really fussy but all that has changed thanks to a little medicine called Zantac. He is amazing and has not thrown up once, not only has he not thrown up but he's SOOOO happy now!! And not only has his G.E.R.D cleared up so has his right tear duct all on it's own. YAY!!! His left one is still clogged and we are being sent to a civilian ophthalmologist so I have to wait for Tricare (our insurance) to send us the referral paper work.

Such a HAPPY baby!!!

Also I wanted to say HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY to one of my most dedicated readers!! I hope you had an awesome day!!! Love and miss you Aunt Lisa!!!

R.I.P (to someone other than Michael)

This is bothering me quite a bit and I need to vent. Why is it that all I have heard in the news today is something to do with Michael Jackson's one year anniversary of him passing, but yet I have heard nothing of Farrah's who died the exact same day. I am even more aggravated by the fact that while skimming through the channels tonight there was channel after channel of Michael Jackson based T.V shows on. Where are the Farrah Fawcett true stories? Where are her tributes? Where are the Charlie's Angels re-runs? Why is it that as a society we would rather remember someone who became a pop icon by grabbing his crotch, crazy antics (hanging a baby off of a balcony, child molestation charges, and making so called "jesus juice") then someone who was thought of as America's sweetheart at one point. Who's claim to fame was a television show, and her famous hair do. Maybe the fact I'm a victim of childhood molestation is why I despise M.J so much (yes, I know he was acquitted the second time, but it still makes me curious as to why he would settle for $22 mil if there had been no wrong doing on his part for the first count). Another thing that bugs me are all the reports of his drug use which is what lead to his eventual death. I'm sorry but if you choose to over use drugs then you choose the consequences. If I remember correctly Farrah died after a long, hard battle with CANCER... something she didn't choose...something she fought long and hard. She wanted to live, obviously if Michael did he would have made different choices. Now I know he made huge strides in pop music and even I'm a fan of thriller, however it is possible to like a song and not like the person who performs it. So since no one else seems to be saying Rest In Peace Farrah, I thought I would. To a woman who was a talented actress, and artist. May you be remembered on this day and every other day.

Sweet Cheeks

After our bath tonight we decided to have some much needed tummy time. Kevin does NOT like tummy time and gets very mad. (see here). However, when it seems that while naked and propped up on the boppy he will actually stand it for about ten minutes. So now he can exercise those neck muscles and look super adorable while doing it.

G.E.R.D and Goobers

Caution: The following post talks about baby barf and burgers of the eye variety. Please proceed only if you think babies are cute no matter what they do... including bodily functions and secretions.

Kevin had a well baby check up today basically for his 2 month check up but because of our vacation we were a little late in getting in there. I had quite a few questions for the Doc today. First Kevin has had problems with spitting up (o.k, well vomiting) since he was born. If he doesn't puke immediately after eating he will spit up multiple times which makes us very anxious when we feed him. We have tried everything including, stopping nursing, a soy formula, a sensitive formula, and keeping him upright for an hour after feeding. It's like playing throw up Russian roulette when we feed him and especially more so in public. Which of course means that when I take him to talk to the Dr. about this I get thrown up on after a waiting room feeding, only made worse by the fact I didn't have my usual huge burp rag or husband to hold the baby so I can clean both of us up after ward. As I'm sitting there cursing the fact that I have baby barf running down my cleavage yet once again today, I notice the baby rubbed it all over his face, eyes, nose and everything. So being the mommy I am, I continue to let the puke run down my shirt, hurry and grab a wipe (more like 10) to clean Kevin off only to have my name called by the nurse letting us know it's our turn. I'm really hoping they will address this issue this time. Last appointment we had the Dr. played it off as a normal baby thing. This time though they can see the amount of throw up that comes up, as there is evidence clearly on and running down my shirt. Not to mention that when they check his weight and height he has spurted percentile wise for his height but has remained the same for his weight. The Dr. (obviously I requested a different one) totally agreed something needed to be done so he was diagnosed with G.E.R.D (gastro-oesophageal reflux disease) and he was prescribed Zantac. Hopefully this will help our little man.

His stats:
Weight 12 lbs 12 oz (75th percentile)
Height 25 inches (90th percentile)
Head Circumference 14 inches (65th percentile)

We also wanted his tear ducts looked at. He was born with clogged tear ducts which makes for a lot of eye goobers which we continually have to wipe away. We were also told massaging them would help clear them up and that they should be cleared by about 1 1/2 to 2 months. Well, they haven't cleared up and in fact they seem to be getting worse. The Dr set up a referral to be seen at the Naval hospital by an Ophthalmologist to possibly have Kevin's tear ducts surgically opened. Not opening them can lead to infection and the longer you wait to surgically open them the rate of success drops. We have to wait two days before scheduling the appointment and I'm hoping surgery won't be needed but I don't want infection to happen either.

Poor baby, look at his red, goopy eyes!!

In case he didn't have enough going on with the reflux, and eye goobers, he also had his 2 month immunizations done today. Three, yes THREE shots and an oral vaccine. My poor baby had such a rough day and we both cried. Now he is sleeping, which on a side note he is up to 8 1/2 hours through the night now. I think I am more traumatized by this day than he was.

Bath Time Fun

While we were on vacation we had to improvise quite a bit on bath time. In Idaho we used a big soup bowl, and in Washington and Oregon my Mom-A showed me how to use a towel in the regular bathtub. Well there is no going back to his baby tub now. He absolutely loves being in the tub like this, he's able to kick his feet, and move his arms to splash. He also lifts his butt up and attempts to scoot so we have to have two people in there to keep a handle on him but he enjoys it so much who cares if it's more inconvenient for us. He LOVES it!!

Shadows

Kevin loves to stare at the ceiling. We have a bunch of trees outside our living room window and they cast amazing shadows on the ceiling and he just stares and stares at them. The blowing leaves, and the moving flowers just intrigue him. It's quite funny because the only time he doesn't notice we have left the room is if his shadows are with him.

To an amazing Father

To my amazing husband who gave me such a wonderful little boy!!

I love how you hold our little boy,

You hold him like you will never let him go.

You protect and love him like only a father could,

Your bond with him is so special and amazing

You give him kisses because he is the sweetest thing in the world to you.

You snuggle with him as if he were a warm blanket.

You play with him as his best friend.

I have loved you since day one. My love for you has grown stronger each and every day, but the moment you become a father to our son, it was then that I felt my heart would explode. Thank you for being such a great husband and daddy. Happy Fathers Day!!

The best sound

Yesterday at approximately 9 p.m. our little man laughed for the first time. Now he has what I call a little nerdy laugh that he has done in his sleep since he was like 3 weeks old, however this was totally awake and totally because we did something he liked. His nerdy laugh is adorable. It's usually after a few sleep smiles. His body starts to jump up and down, and then he sounds somewhat like Erkel which I though was pretty damn cute but it doesn't even compare to his real laugh. Kevin and I were sitting on the couch, my legs stretched out on the ottoman, he was laying on them propped up on the boppy. I held on to his little hands and pulled him up just a little bit while making a typical mommy noise, you know the usual little baby talk and then he released his laugh.... It was AWESOME!!!

Washington

While in Washington I had a goal to complete something really special for my Dad for Father's day. I took some pictures of all of his kids each in their own frame. I then bought this really nice 11 slot frame from best buy and took pictures of his grandkids. I also included pictures in their of his kids holding their kids. Here are some of the pics I took.

All of my Dad's kids holding their kids. (Amanda w/Adam, Tara w/ Tiara, and Me w/ Kevin)

Tara and Tiara (she is such a chunk and so cute... she's only 6 months old)

Me and Kevin

Amanda and Adam

One of Tiara's solo pictures.

Adam & Kevin (I love black and white pictures)

Kevin's solo picture.

The two Kevins.

This is one of my favorites!! All the Grandbaby feet put together!!

In the frame I also put in a picture of my sister Kindra and her son Carson. My Dad absolutely loved it and I was so happy I was able to do it for him while I was there. I think my camera takes some pretty good pictures!!

Washington and Oregon (Mommy's turn)

Part 3 Oregon!!

After spending 2 weeks in Idaho Ken had to go back to Virgina. Kevin and I went to Washington and Oregon for a week. We stayed with my Mom Alese and her husband Dave from Thursday until Monday afternoon. I had such a great time. Her house is always so relaxing, they live on a golf course in Woodburn complete with tennis courts, and a swimming pool. Unfortunately the weather didn't cooperate as well as we had hoped and I didn't get to swim but that's o.k. It was so much fun being there. Idaho was fun but a little stressful at times because our time was stretched in between so many people and it doesn't matter how long you make your vacation it still seems like you don't have enough time. At Mom A's though it was just her and Dave that were there so it made for some great one on one time. She even came in the room in the mornings and took the baby down stairs for his morning feeding and let me sleep in... talk about a vacation!! I think she was very excited to get to meet little Kevin finally.

Meeting Grandma A for the 1st time.

Grandma loved holding him!!

I think he loved being held!!

After spending that 4 day weekend with Mom A she dropped us off at my sister Amanda's in Vancouver. They stayed in Idaho for the Memorial day weekend and just got back. I had wanted to take my sisters and our kids to the zoo while I was in WA but the weather was so yucky. It's a little ironic most people go vacation on the beach while it's nice and sunny I chose to leave the beach for rainy and cold haha!!

Idaho Trip Part 2

I met so many people in Idaho. I even met Mommy's oldest best friends, Auntie Hope and Auntie Jackie.

(Mommy, Me and Auntie Hope)

(Me and Auntie Jackie)

Not only did I meet these "adopt-a-aunts" I met some of my real ones. I finally got to meet Aunt Manda, Mommy said Aunt Manda came to see me being born but had to leave before I came. She was really excited to see me.


I had so much fun in Idaho and I met so many people. I also went to some pretty big events, including my blessing and Uncle Kyler's graduation. I was sad when we had to leave but excited to be going somewhere else new.

Our Trip in Idaho (from Kevin's point of view)

PART 1)

Mommy, Daddy and I went on a BIG trip!! We flew clear across the Country from Virginia to Salt Lake City, stayed in Idaho for 2 weeks then Mommy and I went to Oregon and Washington for a week. I went on an airplane for the first time, well mommy said I was on one twice when I was still in her belly but that doesn't really count. Mommy and Daddy got so many compliments on how good I was. They didn't know how I would do on such long airplane rides, but it was so calming I slept most of the time. I got a little mad once after we stopped in Chicago when we had what Mom and Dad called a "layover"and since the Chicago airport is so big it took mom and dad a while to get to where the next plane was, this made me a little grumpy cause I was hungry. But Mom and Dad fed and changed me and I was good to go. I even stayed awake for some of the Chicago to SLC flight and mommy nursed me, it was a good flight. I was a really good boy.

(Me asleep on the plane!!)

Mommy was really excited because every single flight we had ( A total of 5) there was an empty seat so I was able to use my car seat!! Mommy brought the snuggly just in case, but was excited when I could be safely buckled up. Once in Salt Lake mommy's Aunt Sherise and our cousins came and picked us up and we stayed the night with them. It was really fun!! I was held the whole time. The only time Mommy held me was when I was hungry. Aunt Sherise LOVED holding me, Mommy says she's my great Aunt... and I agree!!

(She definitely knows how I like to snuggle)

After staying the night with Aunt Sherise and our cousins we met up with Mommy's mom, my Grandma Brenda. Grandma Brenda, Uncle Kyler and Grandma's Yorkie, Mercedes picked us up and we then stayed the first night in Idaho at Grandma and Grandpas house. There were a lot of different animals there. Grandma B has chickens, kitties, and puppies. I can't wait til I'm big enough to play with them. The next day I met my Great Grandma Nana, and another Great Aunt, Aunt Lisa. I definitely know why these people are called "Greats"!!

(Me and Nana)

(Me and Great Aunt Lisa)

This was also the day we went up to Archer, which is a little town in Idaho where my other Great Grandparents, the Woods' live. Mommy kept singing over the river and through the woods to grandmothers house we go, and she was right. We went through the woods and over two bridges to get there. Once there I met more Greats!! I was really fascinated by Great Grandpa. He had a lot of stories to tell. He told me about Mommy and how she was afraid of monsters in their basements, he also told me about how she lived there when she was a baby, and he told me about how he was going to bless me. Grandpa told lots of great stories and I tried to tell some too. I liked to talk to Grandpa.

(Having one of my conversations with Great Grandpa)

Daddy was so relaxed at Grandma & Grandpa's. It was really quiet there and so peaceful, I was pretty relaxed too.

I got a little nervous when daddy made a joke about making baby soup, but when I realized he was talking about giving me a bath I got excited, they're my favorite!!! We didn't have my usual bath tub so mommy and daddy improvised.

I met so many people on our trip, I even met a great, great Aunt and lots and lots of cousins. I didn't know I had such a big family! I also met some very strange family members.....

(This is Aunt Hope's baby Lilly, quite a weird looking baby if you ask me)